The best Hinge prompts reveal something recognisably you and give another person an easy opening to reply. Pick an answer that shows a genuine preference, a small story or your sense of humour. Specific beats generic: a disastrous cooking experiment is more memorable than announcing that you 'love food'.
A gentleman's Hinge profile is a peculiar little shop window. Three written answers, a handful of photographs and approximately seven seconds in which a complete stranger decides whether you're intriguing or merely a man who enjoys 'food, travel and banter'.
I enjoy food myself. Without it, one becomes terribly thin. But announcing the fact is not a personality.
The best Hinge prompts for guys do something far more useful than announce that you're tall, ambitious or mysteriously 'looking for my partner in crime'. They give a woman a glimpse of the man she'll meet when the screen disappears: what makes him grin, where he spends Sunday, what he cares about and whether an evening in his company might be deliciously entertaining.
Not everybody will fancy that man. Splendid. You're not trying to attract the entire female population of Berkshire. You're trying to attract somebody who actually likes you.
Three prompts. Three different glimpses of one man.
Hinge's current profile format asks you to answer three prompts. Treat them as a miniature conversation, not three chances to tell the same joke. I like a simple division: one answer shows your everyday life, one your playful side and one what kind of connection you want.
Suppose your answers are: 'I love travelling', 'My simple pleasures: travelling' and 'Together we could: travel'. Congratulations, you've successfully advertised yourself as a suitcase.
A better trio might show that you restore old motorcycles, have outrageous opinions about roast potatoes and would like a relationship involving spontaneous days out as well as evenings at home. Suddenly there's a human being on the page. Better still, there's something she can ask you about.
Before choosing prompts, write down five things your mates would recognise as yours: a habit, an interest, an opinion, a small ambition and a story you're happy to tell. None need involve skiing through Monaco on a diamond-encrusted jet ski. Truth is attractive partly because you can discuss it for longer than eleven seconds.
'My simple pleasures': the little things that reveal a lot
This is a cracking prompt for a man whose life is interesting in ordinary ways. The mistake is listing 'coffee, sunshine and good company'. You could be describing a spaniel.
Try: 'Saturday mornings fixing an old bike, an unnecessarily strong coffee and finding a pub that still knows how to keep its chips crisp.' It tells us about your weekends, your humour and perhaps where a first date might lead.
Or: 'A vinyl record with a few scratches, cooking something with far too much garlic and a Sunday that doesn't involve setting an alarm.' That answer has atmosphere. You can almost smell the kitchen. Hopefully the garlic isn't quite so strong when you lean in for a kiss.
If you're quieter, let the answer be quieter. 'A bookshop where nobody rushes you and a walk that accidentally becomes two hours' is more alluring to the right woman than a counterfeit declaration of being the life and soul of every party.
The rule isn't to sound sophisticated. It's to give a detail somebody could picture, disagree with or gently tease you about.
'I'm looking for': say something that a grown-up can understand
Men sometimes behave as if admitting they'd like a relationship will cause their trousers to burst into flames. So they write 'seeing what's out there', even when they'd be thrilled to find somebody to share a home and a packet of biscuits with.
If you want a proper relationship, say so. But leave the wedding venue out of the opening answer.
Something like: 'A woman I can be ridiculous with in private, reliable for in public, and genuinely excited to see at the end of an ordinary Wednesday.'
That's romantic without sounding as though you've begun naming children. Another version, for a man dating more casually, might be: 'Good conversation, mutual attraction and the honesty to say what we're both looking for.'
Your intentions aren't marketing copy. A woman seeking the opposite thing is entitled to pass, and you've both been spared a lengthy muddle involving somebody's feelings and a half-finished bottle of Rioja.
'The way to win me over': never write a set of demands
This prompt can turn a pleasant fellow into the sort of restaurant guest who sends back toast for being too beige.
'Be loyal, feminine, drama-free, attractive, independent and able to take a joke' isn't flirting. It's a job specification with nowhere to apply.
Try describing a scene instead: 'Tell me about the thing you're absurdly enthusiastic about, then let me take you somewhere we can argue cheerfully over the pudding menu.'
Or: 'Suggest a place you've always wanted to visit, be kind to the staff and laugh when my attempt at speaking Italian collapses after buongiorno.'
You're communicating values without making her sit an exam. And if you're tempted to write 'must have banter', explain what yours actually looks like. A playful answer should demonstrate the humour rather than place an order for it.
'A typical Sunday': the most underrated compatibility test
Two people can fancy each other desperately and want completely different lives. One dreams of a dawn hill walk; the other considers Sunday morning a sacred treaty with the duvet. Neither is wrong. But a prompt revealing that difference can do more good than a polished jawline.
A weekend answer could read: 'Roast dinner at my mum's, a respectable argument about football, then home to pretend I understand the instruction manual for whatever I've been building.'
Another: 'A swim, a long lunch with friends and an evening convincing myself I don't need another houseplant.'
Both let a woman imagine joining the day. They also give her permission to say, 'Absolutely not, I refuse to be awake before ten', which is an excellent opening to a conversation about whether you should ever share a holiday cottage.
Don't borrow my Sunday. Your own is much more interesting to the woman who'll eventually be spending one with you.
'Together we could': invite her into a picture, not a fantasy
'I could take you anywhere in the world' sounds grand. It also suggests you might be selling timeshares.
Try a plausible adventure: 'Find the best little seafood place on the coast, order far too much, then walk it off while debating whether seagulls are organised criminals.'
For a city chap: 'Spend a rainy afternoon in a gallery, choose the worst painting as our favourite and recover with cocktails somewhere dark and indecently comfortable.'
These answers offer a feeling rather than a boast. Notice, too, that they give her room: perhaps she hates seafood but loves galleries. A prompt should open a door, not announce that every date must comply with your itinerary.
A useful test: could you actually suggest this outing next month without borrowing money or pretending to be someone else? If yes, you're on promising territory.
Humour: one good wink beats a circus full of clowns
You know I'm fond of a mischievous line. But a dating profile isn't a comedy audition. Three punchlines can make a man appear oddly impossible to speak to seriously.
A little cheek works best when it's attached to something true. 'Unusual skill: I can assemble flat-pack furniture without shouting at anybody, provided nobody speaks to me for twenty minutes' tells us more than 'fluent in sarcasm'.
Avoid jokes that put women down, mock former partners or make you sound contemptuous of dating itself. A woman has not downloaded Hinge to spend Friday evening being insulted by a chap who thinks that counts as charisma.
And leave the heroic self-deprecation under control. 'I'm dreadful at everything and honestly don't know why I'm here' asks a stranger to provide reassurance before she's even said hello. Much better to laugh at your disastrous soufflé while sounding perfectly happy with the chef who made it.
Four complete prompt sets you can make your own
Consider these demonstrations, not scripts to copy word for word. The world's dating apps do not need six hundred men claiming the same fictional addiction to antique maps.
The outdoorsy but civilised bloke. 'My simple pleasures: the first coffee after a cold morning walk.' 'Together we could: find a seaside town neither of us has visited and judge its fish and chips with unnecessary seriousness.' 'I'm looking for: someone who enjoys a bit of adventure and an equally good evening doing nothing.'
The bookish, quietly funny chap. 'A typical Sunday: an independent bookshop, a decent lunch and pretending I only bought one novel.' 'The way to win me over: tell me which film deserves its reputation and which absolutely doesn't.' 'I'm looking for: affection, good conversation and somebody who appreciates comfortable silences.'
The family-minded grown-up. 'I geek out on: learning recipes that my nieces then announce are too spicy.' 'Together we could: discover a new restaurant and make our own house speciality at home.' 'I'm looking for: something real, playful and kind, with space for both our lives.'
The gloriously sociable man. 'My simple pleasures: hosting dinner, choosing the music and handing out second helpings.' 'The way to win me over: bring a story I haven't heard and strong opinions about dessert.' 'I'm looking for: chemistry, loyalty and somebody who'll occasionally persuade me to leave the party early.'
The trick is not the wording. It's that each trio reveals a recognisable person, with no three answers doing the same job.
Run the reply test before you publish
Imagine you're the woman reading it. What could you say next without resorting to 'haha'? If you struggle to invent a natural question, the prompt probably needs another detail.
'Love music' invites very little. 'Still trying to decide whether a live brass band can improve any wedding' invites an argument, a story and perhaps a warning about your dancing. Keep the response friendly to somebody who knows nothing about you; a private joke between you and your brother may leave the rest of civilisation baffled.
Check that the answer sounds like something you'd say aloud. Your friends should recognise you. An answer which resembles a motivational LinkedIn post has wandered into the wrong establishment.
Finally, read the three together. Do they show a warm, rounded man or three identical performances? Change whichever one is doing the least work. Hinge also offers optional feedback on prompt answers; useful perhaps, but your own judgement gets the casting vote.
A prompt won't rescue a profile that tells the wrong story
Your written answers and photographs should agree. If you declare yourself a quiet country-walk lover beside six nightclub photographs, she'll understandably wonder which version arrives at the restaurant. Likewise, a splendidly witty set of prompts cannot compensate for images in which your face is entirely hidden behind sunglasses.
Keep photographs current and unmistakably yours. Check whether your intentions are consistent across the profile. Resist the urge to revise everything after one uneventful Tuesday. Silence on an app isn't a scientific assessment of your worth; people have jobs, tastes and lives beyond the screen.
The best prompt is neither the cleverest nor the cheekiest. It's the one that makes the right woman think, 'I know exactly what I'd ask that man.'
Then, old boy, you can put the phone down and practise being every bit as charming in person. Which is where the interesting part begins.